Tuesday, April 14, 2009

falling through the cracks times 10

I just finished reading a new book from the library, The Trouble With Boys by Peg Tyre which details the gender gap that exists today. Boys are expelled from preschool, are doped up on prescription drugs, are disengaged from extracurricular activities, take few AP classes, don't apply to college, and as a result are less educated and earn less than their 20-something female peers. Something has gone terribly wrong with how we raise and educate boys and this book explores some of the reasons behind the problem.


I wouldn't want to condense this book to a few short quips, but imagine yourself as a little boy growing up today expected to sit still for hours each day with no opportunity to race around or play the kind of games that come naturally, pushed beyond your developmental capacity, surrounded all day by women who seem frustrated and disappointed by your behavior, and not given good examples of how to become a man. You might just end up frustrated, tuned out, and spending your days playing video games too.

What should we do as homeschooling parents to help our sons and encourage other parents? Give boys lots of opportunities to blow off steam in free play, don't expect them to sit still all day- Mary Kay Clark, bless her soul, suggests having boys jump rope between subjects (she mentions this in every talk, but she has raised 7 sons, so she does know from whence she speaks), encourage reading but let them learn at their own pace (my oldest didn't really read until the beginning of 2nd grade- a big no-no these days in public school), get them involved in boy-centered activities such as Cub/Boy Scouts, encourage extracurricular activities other than just sports, find them fun but educational hobbies such as model building, and pray for them.

This issue is not just one that affects parents of boys, but our entire culture as we shift from a traditional family model to one in which 1 in 3 wives are out earning their husbands and dominate almost every professional field. I do have hope that the pendulum is swinging back toward doing right by boys and this book gives examples of how we can assist in educating all of America's children well.

5 comments:

Unknown said...

I think this is something very troubling. As the mother of two boys, I worry about how to keep them engaged as they move through schooling and learn to be men, not metrosexual individuals. I know this is not politically correct to say, but wives earning more than their husbands disturbs me too, as who could afford to stay home with their children and RAISE them if moms are the breadwinners? (no offense to stay-at-home-dads - I love you all)

Henry Cate said...

You might find "Men to Boys" an interesting, and scary, read.

In some ways the book is a follow on to "The Trouble With Boys." It talks about how the result of treating boys poorly is they don't want to grow up.

kat said...

Kristina- I worry about this for my girls too. Who are they going to marry and provide well enough so they can stay home with their children?

Kristina said...

I have a daughter as well (A precocious 2 1/2 year old named Katherine), and worry too about her finding a man (you know, in fifty years when she's allowed to be interested in dating) who will be the kind of person her father is - a responsible man who provides for his family spiritually, as well as financially.

I can but hope that enough parents are out there raising their children with the same devotion and that we are raising our children smart enough to be able to identify them!

Jeanne said...

Boys Adrift has a similar scary theme. You might want to check that out!